You’re so prolific
An impact factor well above thirty two
It makes me jealous
And in need of passing this peer review–

You know my motivations
In search of reputation
My erdos number ill acquire from you

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23:09 < justin> Erlang tattoo might be cool
23:09 < justin> not many have those
23:10 < justin> not even sure what that would look like
23:10 < aphyr_> Yeah, really gonna add to my aura of mysterious sexiness
23:10 < aphyr_> "What's that?"
23:10 < aphyr_> "Oh, that's Erlang. It's a distributed functional programming language."
23:10 < justin> Mad tail
23:10 < aphyr_> "Tell me, would you and your friends like to do it... concurrently?"
23:13 < aphyr_> "Oh sorry. You're not my... TYPE."
23:13 < aphyr_> DAMN YOOOOUUU STATIC COMPILERS!

Things are getting a little slap-happy here in the final hours before Showyou launch.

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Scaling up

“So,” our CEO asked me, “what happens if our new service becomes a huge success?”

aphyr: I think basically we can *expect* the service to collapse in unpredictable ways
mark: that would not be good
aphyr: No this is good!
aphyr: It means we averted all the ways it would predictably collapse!
mark: thanks kyle, i'll sleep well over the weekend now :-)

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Sometimes you need to figure out where ruby code came from. For example, ActiveSupport showed up in our API and started breaking date handling and JSON. I could have used git bisect to find the commit that introduced the problem, but there’s a more direct way.

<cr:code lang=“ruby”> set_trace_func proc { |event, file, line, id, binding, classname| if id == :require args = binding.eval(“local_variables”).inject({}) do |vars, name| value = binding.eval name vars[name] = value unless value.nil? vars end

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cs.jpg

If I recall correctly, this was the result of a protracted 1v1 CounterStrike match between myself and Jon Beare. Neither of us could move without exposing ourselves, so we fought by proxy.

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Researchers at KERN (the Kyle Eats Ridiculously Nook) have announced reactions of unprecedented energy. The upcoming paper is expected to place new upper bounds on the maximum mass of the T-Burgeron. Results from the TASTEBUD array and Digestive Calorimeter are said to be “off the charts.”

Quantum foam researchers are eagerly awaiting the results of the supersymmetric supersalad (S4) experiment, which is the first to explore symmetry breaking between feta cheese and fresh c-tomatoes. High activation energies in fork-lettuce interactions have long limited the experimental accessibility of the salad model, but new models of bound arugula-cucumber pairs suggest a “delicious island of stability” may lurk at larger plate sizes.

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